She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
