My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
