I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
soo... how was my night?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
