we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
