so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
