you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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