"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize