My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
she peed on how many people?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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