it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
