she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
