my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
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its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
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In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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