His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
