dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
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