The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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