my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize