I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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