There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Someone signed my nipple.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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