just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize