just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I wish i was in the wii world.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
