omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
