What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
