but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize