she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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