How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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