So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
