The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
operation have a gay friend backfired
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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