yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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