just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I'm sobbing to NWA
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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