He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
