so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
