David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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