all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
