his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
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still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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