white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
