Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
