so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
