She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Do vagina's smell?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
