WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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