The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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