Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize