Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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