Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize