News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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