why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
