At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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