Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize