dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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