I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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