Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
