BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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