Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize