I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
